When it comes to dating, matchmaking and attraction, one key area of compatibility is sexual attitudes, and having similar sexual desires and libido. It seems that porn stars have figured out the secret to matching sexual desires. There are assumptions made about porn stars being avid drug users, having poor self-image and low self-esteem. On the contrary, a recent study proves otherwise.

Research published in the latest edition of the Journal of Sex Research suggests that "porn stars have higher self-esteem, a better quality of life and body image and are more spiritual than their non-adult entertainment counterparts." Let's learn some lessons from porn stars, in order to take our bedroom behavior to new heights.

Lesson #1: Be willing to try anything. If there's a common denominator when it comes to porn, it's that almost anything goes. In other words, you can expect to see a lot of sex enjoyed in a variety of positions and places and penetration happening in every possible orifice.

Sometimes there is loads of foreplay. Other times, it's wham bam! So, whatever you are in the mood for, the tip to remember is to be open-minded and have the attitude of exploration and experimentation ... that is, as long as you're with a partner you trust. When you adopt that "anything goes" attitude, you create an increased level of excitement, especially when you introduce positions, places and sex toys that are new to your typical routine.

Lesson #2: Dirty talk works wonders. What makes porn hot is that the porn stars vocalize their appreciation and enjoyment of every activity taking place. They describe each action and each body part. Using descriptive vocabulary is a huge turn-on and will heighten the experience as you enjoy the moments.

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Lesson #3: Show and tell. Porn stars seem to know exactly what to say and how to say it. If they want something done right, they'll show you how to please them. Whatever it is that they want or need to make the experience more pleasurable is what they will openly communicate. This is a great lesson to learn when your partner is just learning how to please you. Don't be shy to guide them or play a little "show and tell" so everyone is happy.

Lesson #4: Exploring sexual fantasies and fetishes are a turn-on. What would porn be without the naughty little school girl, the hot and sweaty pool boy, the misbehaved student and teacher, the sensual masseuse or overtly curious doctor? Pornos seem to highlight and play out the mental and stereotypical sexual scenarios that men and women talk about and fantasize most.

Whether you are the cougar about to prey on an unassuming cub, or the MILF who has invited little Johnny over to help with his homework, you can have just as much fun at home role-playing your favorite fantasies!

If millions of people every day turn to porn for sexual stimulation and tips, we should learn a thing or two from these "sexperts" in order to have more fulfilling, pleasurable and erotic experiences with our partners.

For more great dating and relationship tips, be sure to visit my blog at Also, check out my Emotional Fitness series with Dr.Sara Solomon for a video guide and tutorial of achieving a healthy mind, heart and body!