The last and only time Jameer Nelson can remember crying after a basketball game came in 2004, right after the last shot of his college career slid off the rim, leaving him and Saint Joseph’s just short of the Final Four. He sat at the top of the key, numb for a few seconds, and then the tears fell. But those were angry tears, the kind you squeeze out in frustration and disbelief, your face scrunched up from the anguish.

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These were different. The tears spilling down Nelson’s cheeks two weeks ago were the best sort, the ones made when a moment crystallizes in damned near perfection. His son and namesake found Nelson and his wife, Imani, under the net and for a few blissful seconds — while the celebration spilled all around them after Delaware won the Colonial Athletic Association tournament and automatic bid — the family huddled in their own private cocoon of joy.

It is the age-old axiom of parenthood, that you want more for your kids than you ever want for yourself. Their disappointments hurt twice as much as your own, their successes make your heart soar higher than you thought possible. As Nelson stood there and squeezed his eldest son, the one borne just as he was embarking on his own collegiate career, the one-time NBA All-Star, college All-American, Player of the Year, Sports Illustrated cover boy and Philly folk hero reached his own parental nirvana. “The moment we had the other day,’’ he says, “made me more proud than any basketball moment I’ve ever had for myself.’’

To understand just why, you have to go inside that familial huddle, to the words the son whispered to the father as they embraced. “Dad,’’ Jameer Nelson Jr. said, “this has taken so long.’’

You could say the same about Delaware. The Blue Hens’ ride to their first NCAA berth in eight years is eerily similar to that of their leading scorer and most famously named player, a bumpy and messy ride that at times shook their confidence to the core. They got here, to a date with No. 2 seed Villanova on Friday, the same way Jameer Jr. did; they put their heads down and went back to work. Now they will be expected to do their basketball civic duty — maybe make things itchy for a little bit but ultimately bow out with grace. “People will count us out. People counted me out,’’ Jameer Jr. says. “But we always knew what we had. We just had to put it back together. Now, we have absolutely nothing to lose at this point.’’

A few weeks ago, Martin Ingelsby scratched some words on a sticky note and stuck it on his desk. In the gap between the end of the regular season and the start of the conference tournament, he considered his message again: “Be positive. Believe in the bottom line. Have fun.’’ All three, he realized, were missing. Picked to win the CAA in the preseason, the Blue Hens instead spiraled through a disastrous finish to the regular season, losing three games in a row, including a humiliating loss to Charleston in which a team that just a week before held three opponents under 60 points gave up 99 to the sixth-best team in the league.

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Delaware not only didn’t win the regular-season crown it hoped and half expected to achieve, it tumbled all the way to the fourth seed in its tournament. Ingelsby knew his players were both in shock and shook.

Blessed with a roster that includes three fifth-year players, a grad student, one redshirt senior and one traditional senior, Ingelsby felt certain he could push them and challenge them, but he wanted to make sure he adhered to his first sticky-note principle — to do it in a way that built them up. On their first practice to prep for the CAA tournament, he laid it all out. “I believe that we are the best team in the league, but we need to play like it now,’’ he told them. “No more, ‘We can turn it on next week, or in 10 days.’ It’s now or never. Otherwise, it’s over.’’ He got after them hard, refusing to accept the tiny mistakes that often are excused late in the season. He reinstituted loose-ball drills, and punishment runs up the stairs. Yet he strove to deliver the hammer with a cushion, tempering his demands with encouragement. He reiterated that they were 0-0, gifted a fresh start to realize the potential they were afforded way back in October.

But the last line item stayed with Ingelsby, too — to make basketball fun again. The grind of a season, compounded by the angst that only those who exist in a one-bid league can appreciate, can suck the joy out of anyone. Ingelsby knew his Blue Hens needed the sweet spot of being challenged and carefree. Fortunately, he comes by an appreciation for the fun of hoops naturally. Before Delaware, Ingelsby spent 13 years as Mike Brey’s sidekick at Notre Dame. “The loosest coach in America,’’ Ingelsby says of his mentor. The coach tore up his practice plan, doing away with the monotony of planning and instead allowed his players to enjoy the freeform of five-on-five. They mixed up teams, and just played — up and down, down and up, high energy, small segments of drills — and rediscovered the simple joy of watching the ball go through the hoop.

When the Blue Hens arrived in Washington D.C. for the league tournament, Ingelsby scheduled a team dinner at the Capital Grille — “treated them a little bit,’’ he says — and let them enjoy the city’s wharf area sites. “To be honest, those three days were the most important of the entire season,’’ Ingelsby says. “They went from feeling like they were carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders to finding the simple joy in playing.’’

Jameer Sr. does not hover. When he shows up for a game, he buys a ticket. Never asks for a favor or troubles his son for admission. He doesn’t communicate with the coaching staff or ingratiate himself with the assistants. Essentially, he stays out of it, determined to let his kids (his three daughters also are all athletes; eldest, Jamia, will play softball at South Florida) walk their own sports journey.

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He didn’t need to be in the thick of things, though, to understand what was going on with Jameer Jr. last season. “His confidence, it was gone,’’ he says. “Totally gone.’’ Originally committed to his dad’s alma mater, Jameer Jr. changed course after Saint Joe’s fired Phil Martelli, opting instead for George Washington. In his freshman season, he started 28 of 31 games, averaged 31 minutes and 10.4 points per game. But in the offseason, head coach Jamion Christian dug into the transfer portal and added LSU transfer James Bishop. Jameer Jr. moved to the bench, his minutes diminishing significantly. “I was really down,’’ Jameer Jr. says. “It was tough, really tough. I just didn’t feel like myself.’’ By December, he announced his decision to transfer and moved back home. Jameer Sr. and Imani didn’t care where he ended up, so long as he rediscovered his joy for the game. Within a month, Jameer Jr. was ready to sign with Delaware.

Ingelsby had watched him from afar and could see what everyone else saw clearly — that he wasn’t happy at GW. He told his assistant, Bill Phillips, that if he heard rumblings about Jameer Jr. wanting to transfer, go get him. Jameer Jr.’s parents urged caution, suggesting he sit on his decision for a bit, but Jameer Jr.’s mind was made up. He felt a connection to Ingelsby, and the message the coach delivered. Ingelsby didn’t make a lot or promises except one: ensuring Jameer Jr. he would be valued at Delaware. “I told him I can’t promise what the future will hold, but I can assure you that you will become a better player here,’’ Ingelsby says.

Thanks to Delaware’s trimester system, which extends the return for spring semester to February, Jameer Jr. was able to enroll immediately and practice with his new team. More importantly he was able to rediscover the trust that had eroded at George Washington. “It just felt right,’’ Jameer Jr. says. Newly invigorated, he doubled down on his summer workouts, determined to recoup all he had lost when he was finally able to play again.

Jameer Jr. partnered with C.J. Scott, a Philadelphia-area trainer, and when Scott was busy, hit the gym with his dad. The two butted heads occasionally — “I’ll take responsibility for that,’’ Jameer Jr. says with a snicker — but found the common ground of loving the work. Together they set up a grueling schedule, bouncing from workouts to lifting to pick-up. Jameer Sr. worried his son might burn too hot, cautioning him to pace himself. “That’s when I knew his confidence was back,’’ Jameer Sr. says. “He did not want to stop.’’

It’s easy to say now, to insist that the regular-season crash was necessary. Because the Blue Hens are here, in the NCAA Tournament. Five months ago, no one thought such struggle would be necessary. In a crowded field, the Blue Hens got the preseason nod in the CAA based largely on their heft of experience — five starters back, plus Nelson.

Instead the season went more herky-jerky than anticipated, a 9-3 start undone by a 2-2 stumble in league. Teams picked beneath them soared above them, and the last three games really did them in. After giving up 99 to Charleson, they scored just 23 in the first half against UNC Wilmington. “We always, especially Kev (Anderson), Ryan (Allen) and I, we felt like had a great trio of guards, and a really talented team,’’ Jameer Jr. says. “We just couldn’t put it together.’’

Faced with zero margin for error, the Blue Hens finally found their groove, rolling past Drexel and top-seeded Towson to set up the all-or-nothing title showdown against UNC Wilmington, a team that twice beat the Hens in the regular season. Jameer Sr. sneaked in for the game, parking himself on an endline seat with a ball cap pulled tight on his head. He didn’t tell his son he was coming, didn’t even ask for a ticket. At some point the two made eye contact. Rather than make Jameer Jr. nervous, seeing his parents steadied him. “They’ve always kept me level-headed,’’ he says.

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Until, of course, the buzzer sounded, securing the tournament title and the automatic bid. Then the tears came for everybody. Jameer Jr. joked later that his father made him cry on national television, but he admitted it was his emotions spilling out as much as his dad’s. “I was thinking about how I got there, all the stuff I went through, the situation before,’’ he says. “It just all hit me at once.’’

The next day, his campus still in a state of delirium and his own head still spinning in joy, Ingelsby’s phone buzzed with an incoming text message. “Thank you,’’ Jameer Sr., wrote, “for believing in my kid.’’ Asked about the text message a few days later, Jameer Sr. still sounds moved by it all. “When Jameer said to me, ‘This has taken so long,’ I knew exactly what he meant,’’ Jameer Sr. says. “It wasn’t just about how long. What Martin did, that means more to me than anything. My college coach was everything to me. He was my mentor. That’s all I want for my kids, and to see how he’s stood by Jameer and earned his trust, it’s just, I don’t even know what to say. It’s everything.’’

Enough, you might say, to make a grown man cry.

(Top photo: Nick Wass / Associated Press)