Emotional stalkers have a basic need to rid themselves of prevailing emptiness. They frequently achieve this by carefully choosing a victim who is then charmed, seduced and trapped. The victim’s energy feeds the stalker and provides what he lacks.

Being incapable of love, these narcissistic stalkers are ravaged by the furious envy they feel for those who truly enjoy life. We’re not talking of material assets, but of moral qualities: vitality, empathy, sensitivity, creativity, goals, and life projects. Besides, they’re not so easy to identify. They can easily switch their attitude from being charming and caring, to being ruthlessly critical and dismissive, feeding the victim’s confusion and self-doubt.

Emotional stalkers are capable of charming their friends and family with their wit, leaving their victims feeling even more bewildered with their apparently innocent but truly aggressive and humiliating jokes.

Emotional stalkers frequently look for these 5 traits in their victims, some of which might surprise you (but are NEVER the victim’s fault):​

1. Above average intelligence.

Emotional stalkers seek very Intelligent, really bright, highly skilled, well trained victims. They look for enthusiasm and passion about their career.

2. Good work ethic and personal accountability. 

Stalkers want look for their victims to be very responsible and hard workers,always complying with an excellent achievement of responsibilities assigned.

3. Extreme perfectionists.

Victims tend to believe nothing they do is ever good enough, forever striving to receive acknowledgement, meanwhile doubting their true worth.

4. Dependable and always ready to help others. 

Victims tend to keep a low profile and have no wish to overshadow friends or work colleagues.

5. Underlying low self-esteem and low self-confidence. 

Victims of emotional stalkers crave acknowledgement from their partner, though forever doubting their worthiness of it. This is what makes them vulnerable.

Pathological narcissism is a personality disorder, which causes tremendous suffering and damage to those closely related with the disturbed individual. Again, if you ever become a victim of an emotional stalker, it is NEVER your fault and you are not to blame.

Stop cruelly criticizing and blaming yourself, and take a deep look at who it is you are in a relationship with. If the person you love fits the above described behavior and traits, you need to move on with your life sooner than later.

Silvia Horvath is a Jungian Therapist practicing in Buenos Aires, Argentina. You can contact her here.